Hello Aldo? It's me, Betsy...

A certain man in a sweater vest got the best of me today. He is not the first of his peers to do this. I also have a bone to pick with a certain man with two first names. Before I lose readers due solely to political reasons let me explain that I am neither Republican nor Democrat. My opinions do not conveniently fit into those neat boxes. One of my biggest priorities, our planet, used to be a pinnacle of conservative agendas. We've all seen the iconic pictures of Teddy Roosevelt surveying western vistas with John Muir at his side. Sometime between now and then the liberal side of politicians picked up the environmentalists and then proceeded to mostly ignore them. So, I won't say that I feel much love from either side of the table. I am most certainly not saying one person should win over another. This is a call for others to consider the implications of their sound bites.

Lately, those chasing each other's tails to get their names on the big ticket have had considerable success in eliminating large sectors of prospective voters rather than gaining them. Anyone loving "America the Beautiful" is likely part of the turned off crowd. Mr. Sweater Vest has decided that anyone that does not wish to have dominion (definition: sovereign authority or complete control) over the earth is now a radical environmentalist. Fine, I'll be radical if that is what it means to believe that mountains are more than the elements hidden in their crevasses, rocks are more than the oil under them, and prairies are more than the loamy soil amongst their roots.

Mr. Two First Names is calling for the elimination of the Department of the Interior, who controls a little subagency called The National Park Service. What will happen to the national parks? Well that is yet to be seen, but suggestions do include selling them to private entities. As a former park ranger (always in my heart) I take real issue to this. National parks are more than land to be partitioned off to the highest bidder.

Maybe these two men and many others would feel differently if they had had the experiences I have had. It is a common phrase amongst park service employees to say that they get "paid in sunsets." The sunsets are great, but I believe I was always paid in moments of visitors having true engagement with nature. Perhaps the only thing more beautiful than watching small salmon swimming in the freshwater streams of the Hoh Rain Forest is to watch a child spot one for the first time and squeal with delight. Or watching an adults' rusty gears turn in their head after setting themselves to the doldrums of daily routine over the amazing survival capabilities of a kangaroo rat in the desert. Or seeing an indifferent teenager sincerely interested in the slime and slither of a banana slug as opposed to an electronic device. A naturalist witnesses small miracles everyday.

The breathtaking views from a mountain, the crisp, clean taste of water from a freshwater spring, the wonder of encountering a wild animal in it's element- these things will not last without protection. They barely do with it. Most hikers have encountered the water bottle on the path, graffiti on the rocks, and toilet paper in the bushes. Yet these are small threats compared to the pierce of an oil drill, the scar of fracking, and the sting of acid rain.

We need a voice of reason to set our priorities straight. Someone to stand up and say some things in this world are worth more than having the lowest gasoline price possible. I wonder what Aldo Leopold would say about this (do it, look him up...). I am what you might call a Leopold-phile. Interning on the land he once called his own and that inspired A Sand County Almanac was one of the greatest honors of my life. He didn't wear tie-dyed t-shirts, listen to jam bands, or eat tofu. No, he was good ol' boy and he loved this planet too. One of his greatest quotes was "a thing is right when it tends to preserve the integrity, stability and beauty of the biotic community. It is wrong when it tends otherwise." Selling the national parks and having dominion over the earth seem to tend otherwise in my opinion. Have all the leaders willing to say this come and gone? Where is Leopold, Roosevelt or Muir now that we need them?  Now that the greed of consumerism has its eyes on nature's best jewels.

We can live and find a way to adapt without the use of finite resources (we are still determined, intelligent, and inventive Americans, right?). However I am not sure that I could truly live without nature's resources and the beauty, adventure, and hope it gives to my life.

The Haters

Have you ever found yourself sucked into one of Joel Osteen's inspirational "messages" on late night television? If not, this is the time to open a new tab, and google him... maybe make sure you are alone first. He is a spirited, smiley Christian minister. I myself am not religious, and usually born-again types can scare me (i.e. If I blink too long I might end up in a mega-church with the doors locked and on a plank above a Baptismal pool, but that's my issue, not yours) yet I cannot deny that he is an amazingly captivating speaker and his topics can be universal. On this particular night he was talking about ignoring those who do not support you and choosing your battles. If people do not celebrate you, be nice, but move on and stay the course. I cannot argue with that and in fact, I love that!

I am often so worried about other people think. I'm probably even guilty of letting it drive some of the important decisions in my life. I no longer want to allow myself to do things just to please others or to impress others. I have to remember to keep true to myself. Sometimes I know I should just step out of the influence of others and listen to the voice inside of me. I know I have a lot of soul searching in front of me and probably a lot of mistakes but I can't let the fear of being judged by others stop me. I told my husband tonight that I want to try out for the television show The Voice. If you haven't seen it, you may just want to skip to the next paragraph because this is going to get specific. I have it all planned out in my head. I am going to sing The Thunder Rolls by Garth Brooks and it is going to be show-stoppingly great. Then, all the judges are going to turn around and fight for me. I am going to wobble between Blake and Adam, but I am ultimately going to choose Blake because I think Adam and his tattoos will distract me too much. Of course my husband laughed because he has never heard me sing beyond a whisper tone unless I am doing a parody of Josh Groban or Mariah Carey or someone. And in all honestly, I'm probably not what the show is looking for, but maybe I should take on one of those crazy dreams in my head. Who cares if no one turns around their chair?! At least I tried.

Often the ones who judge you are the ones you are judging yourself. I can be distracted by others that rub me the wrong way instead of being inspired by those I admire. Another late night led me to making a list (with my trusty 50 pack of Crayola markers) of the traits of those not so favorite people along with those who make my heart hurt because I think they're so amazing. I found that I don't enjoy those who are two-faced, loud (bad loud, not good loud, you know what I mean) and selfish. Most of my favorite people are reflective, intelligent, confident, and caring. I can tend to waste a lot of time thinking about those not-so-favorites. For instance, do you ever find yourself in the shower reliving a moment from a month ago that still makes your blood boil and you're rehashing all the things you should have said (but really shouldn't have) and then realize you've been standing there waaay to long and the water is getting cold? I want to show them how they are wrong, force them to be the people I want them to be, but this is completely not my job. People are going to do what they want and I can only control myself (and thank goodness for that because the world should not be filled with multiple Betsys- there would be a real shortage of kitschy forest animal trinkets). I need to focus on aspiring to be more like those I do admire and avoiding being that two-faced, loud, selfish person I don't much admire. I can lead by example. Anger is energy I could be using towards more useful endeavors. At the end of the day, no matter what those haters say about me, offense is taken, not given. I choose whether or not I am going to let their issues affect me or let it just roll off my back (brush your shoulders off, right?). I can't let the negative energy control my life.

I might start small and finally wear those cute over-the-knee socks I have been scared to bust out before I move on to more daring goals like speaking up for myself amongst a tough crowd or trying something I might fail at, but I know I'll get there. I am the one stuck with me for the rest of my life, so I might as well focus on liking myself instead of trying so hard to make others like me.

My Jungle

Have you ever noticed something and then you start noticing that same thing everywhere you go? It's like a sign? Let me explain. I was driving the other day in Waterloo and there is a "highway" with about fifty stoplights on it. I kept getting stopped right next to this semi truck hauling livestock, despite my attempts to slow down, speed up, change lanes- just about anything to get away. I couldn't escape it and when we stopped at those fifty stoplights I saw piglets... adorable, peach-fuzzed, pink piglets. Then, the next day, in Dubuque, I had the same thing happen, this time it was some big-eyed, hairy cows. Then, three days later, again. See, I have this history with livestock trucks. When I was 12 years old my mother and I were driving across the Tower Drive bridge (in Green Bay) and we passed a similar truck. I looked over and there was this cow sticking his head out one of those little holes. He was letting the air whip across his face, just like a dog does when you open the car window. It was so cute and then it stuck me... this cow was on his way to Packerland Packing. It only had a few minutes left to see sunshine, feel that breeze, and just simply be alive. I never was the same. I stopped eating red meat that day. Soon I stopped eating chicken, and then fish. (Note: I believe that this choice, coupled with my lack of nutritional knowledge and love for only bean burritos has caused my ridiculously short legs). I relapsed into my carnivorous ways during college, because despite my feelings, I do love meat. A couple years ago I read this great book The Kind Diet by Alicia Silverstone, and decided to reinvest in my beliefs and become a vegan.

It is one thing to think you are going to be a vegan and it is a whole different thing to be a vegan. It requires a lot of sacrifice. After a week or two, you don't really mind not eating meat or dairy. Even despite everyone's cries, "Oh, but I could never give up cheese, oh I love cheese so much!" it isn't so bad. And it is a lot healthier. The real challenges set in after those initial couple weeks. After withstanding the never ending eye rolls from dining companions and heckling servers about the preparation of those steamed veggies, you realize, I want to eat something actually off the menu, that I wouldn't make at home. Vegan-friendly restaurants do exist, but it is hard to convince the average person that in fact, Thai and Indian food is good and isn't going to make them smell funny.  The other real sacrifices are time and money. Almost every meal needs to be prepared from scratch, using ingredients that usually cost considerably more than conventional ones. You can be that hippie who soaks their own beans, cooks their own seitan and avoids mock meats, but even being a housewife, I find that difficult. I love to cook, but there are those nights you just don't want to cook this gourmet meal. (To be clear though, I think all of these sacrifices are worth the cost in the long run.)

So you cheat now and then. I let myself eat eggs that come from a local farm, where I can actually see the chickens. I buy bison burgers from a lady at farmers market from the next town over. I occasionally make the perch that my husband's grandfather catches for us. I actually order something off the menu at restaurants. It starts off innocently enough and then you realize, wow, I've been eating an animal product every day this week. Maybe I did sneak a little cheese while chowing down on green enchiladas in Santa Fe, add a little real milk to the mashed potatoes, eat that slightly burnt bratwurst that summer day. Even though it was a choice I made to avoid animal products, I still feel like I did something wrong when I let down my vegan guard.

I think what disappoints me the most is I am not a good example of a vegan. Just the other day a friend tried to bait me into a debate on the harm in eating dairy products- I didn't even try to explain myself. I try to be approachable to others and don't tell the whole story. I tell people I am a vegan for health choices, but that is only part of the story. It does make you feel light, energetic and free, but it's also great for the environment and for the animals. I don't think it is right to stuff a cow full of corn, which isn't meant to digest, and then violently slaughter the animal at poorly run facilities. Same goes for pigs, or hogs as we call them in Iowa. I don't think it is right to squish chickens in a crate way too small for them and cut off part of their beaks to make them egg-laying machines. I don't think it is right to take a calf away from it's mother to feed it powdered chemicals, just so humans can drink that milk meant for them. I truly don't think it is worth the amount of money saved to buy factory farmed meat instead of local, grass-fed meat. I think if we were forced to see the truth and really think about it, more people would feel this way. Maybe if I fought harder for my values and didn't shirk away from tough conversations I could be a better model to those around me and it would make a difference. I won't be discouraged by the fear of being seen as a frenzied, PETA card carrying lunatic, because maybe I am just like one of those people. I definitely don't always agree with my friends and family on issues, so I can be free to do the same. It is okay to not go with the flow if it means I am standing strong on what I believe.

Maybe this is a new years resolution that came one month late, but I am going to try harder. I want to be the change that I want to see in the world. I won't be perfect, but at least I will be striving for a goal. I hope the next time one of those trucks passes me by I'll know I tried my hardest to keep those animals out in the breezy sunshine.